We mainly justify our relationships with people by their use to us. If they’re not serving some purpose to us or are giving us only negative energy, we’re inclined to cut them out of our lives.
There are a number of those inspirational quotes that say something along the lines of people not being worth your time if they don’t give you what you give them. While I agree that we do need to know when enough is enough, there’s another side to these quotes that we sometimes forget to consider.
Determining whether someone should stay in your life or not because they’re not doing any good for you is not always a good thing. People come and go on their own. You can’t force people to stay or leave. It just happens when the time is right.
The problem is that we sometimes fail to recognize (or refuse to) when the time has or has yet to come. Thus, we emotionally stress ourselves over why we can’t keep or get rid of someone in our lives. It’s either because their time was up a while ago or it’s not up yet.
The way I like to think life works is that people’s paths cross because there is something that needs to be learned. For however long it takes, be it weeks, months or years, once that exchange has been made, that’s usually when the time has come to move on with whatever lessons that were gained.
Granted, there are the few who are meant to be in your life for a very long time and can teach you endless lessons. But I’m focusing on everyone else who isn’t. And granted, you can’t foresee who those people are from the start. This is all usually seen in hindsight.
We all know how tough it can be to let someone go when their time with you is up. They served their purpose and taught you the lesson you needed to learn. Done. Unfortunately, all good things come to an end. So when you’re left to wonder why things ended so soon, it’s important to deeply think about what lesson you both may have gained from that relationship – be it about your own selves or about life itself.
But what about the flip side? What about when you want to cut someone out of your life because you feel like they’re not doing anything for you and/or adding to your strides but yet, they’re still around? Well, not everyone who comes into your life is going to teach you something.
Sometimes the teaching isn’t always reciprocated. Sometimes you’re not always the student. Sometimes you’re the one teaching them.
So the next time you find yourself wracking your brain about why the heck a person is still in your life when you don’t need them, keep in mind that maybe you’re needed more in theirs. Whether it’s a listening ear, a reality check, or a helping hand to the next chapter in their life, perhaps you have something to teach them.
Sometimes people need what you have to give. It’s also important to remember that there is only so much of yourself you can keep giving to someone. But when you consider both sides equally, you’ll have what you need to live a life that’s a little more meaningful and thoughtful.
So, LIVE LOVE LAUGH READ.